The Dunbar Principle

As a small business owner, I used to take pride in knowing my team on a personal level. I’m talking names, families, hobbies—you name it. It felt like the right thing to do as a leader, and honestly, I enjoyed it. But as my business has grown, I've had to face a tough truth: I just can’t keep up with everyone anymore.

I recently had a conversation that reminded me of this reality. A fellow business owner was feeling the same struggle. He went from knowing 20 employees deeply to overseeing over 100 spread across multiple states. The guilt of losing those close-knit connections was eating at him.

That’s when I shared something that’s stuck with me: the Dunbar Number. Anthropologist Robin Dunbar found that humans can only maintain about 150 meaningful relationships at a time. That includes family, friends, coworkers—everyone. So if you're trying to personally connect with every employee and still have room for your spouse, kids, and lifelong friends? You're going to hit a wall.

The solution isn’t to give up on connection—it’s to shift how you do it. Build strong relationships with your managers. Let them foster those close connections within their teams. And create opportunities—company-wide events, virtual check-ins—to keep the culture alive.

You’re not a bad leader for not knowing everyone. You’re just human. The key is being intentional with the relationships that matter most—and empowering others to do the same.

Check out The Appraiser Coach Podcast for more info on this topic:

886 The Dunbar Effect and Your Team    AUDIO   VIDEO

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